Why does Dell suck so much?
UPDATE (April 5)Oops! I spoke too soon.The new laptop has problems too. I'm on the phone (again) with Dell's tech support on a Saturday afternoon. Go figure. With luck things will go better this time.
Ok, this is a bit of a rant. But I deserve a rant, because of the WEEKS I've been dealing with Dell's fucking technical lack of support.
As most of you probably aren't aware, I make my actual living not selling books (funny) but doing technical work. I started out about 13 years ago, working help-desk in the basement of the U.S. Department of State. Later I moved on to Teligent, which was briefly an awesome company at the height of the tech boom. At Teligent, I went from help desk, to Microsoft Exchange team leader, to DBA, to Application Support Manager, to Data Center Manager, to IT Operations Manager. Today I'm still doing technical work, as IT DIrector for VFA. That said, in all those years I've bought and recommended Dell equipment. We had thousands of Dell desktops and laptops at Teligent, at hundreds of Dell servers distributed throughout the country (alongside HP-UX, AS400, and a big monster Sun E10K).
Why did I like Dell? At one time they had well put together computers and excellent technical support. When you bought an on-side service contract, they delivered.
Now ... not so much.
My current ordeal began in the summer of 2006, when I bought my son an Inspiron E1405 laptop. I paid several hundred extra dollars for a three year, next day on side service contract that also covered accidental damage, since we all know that kids can cause accidental damage. So far so good. Laptop came, performed well mostly, and everything was happy.
A couple months ago, the battery stopped charging. Unplug it and it dies immediately. So, innocently, I called Dell technical support expecting that they would, within 24 hours, dispatch a new battery to me and all would be well.
No. I took three hours on the phone, getting transferred from department to department. Finally, I got a technical support representative in India, who took me through diagnostics and finally determined that the battery was dead. You'll need to order a new battery, he says.
No, I replied. You'll send me a new battery under my three year extra special warranty.
No, he said. The battery isn't covered under the three year warranty. That's industry standard, he tells me. This is news to me -- the battery in my 18-month old Macbook Pro died, and Apple replaced that on the spot. But apparently Dell is not Apple (not exactly news). I'm frustrated, ask to talk to a manager. The manager blows me off. If I want help, I have to pay for a new battery. The price? $185.
Crap. Well, the kid needs the laptop. He uses it for school, and its important, so I shell out the $185 plus shipping for a new battery (on my Dell Financial Services account, which was probably a mistake).
I'd like to tell you about the happy ending, but there wasn't one. They shipped me the wrong battery. I spend two hours on the phone and finally get an RMA number to send back the wrong battery, then another half hour on the phone with a different department so I can have the privilege of paying $185 plus shipping for a second battery, hopefully this time the right one.
On Friday, the battery arrived, and it looks good. It's the right one, it fits, and within an hour of plugging it into the computer it completely discharged. 0%. Not good. We're right back where we started--new battery. No charge. Damn thing doesn't work unless its not plugged in.
So, about four hours ago (it's now Saturday afternoon, starting into evening) I called Dell back. I wait on hold twenty minutes, then get another technician. This one starts asking me questions and we get disconnected.
Dammit. Call back again. Sit on hold for thirty minutes. Finally get someone. I explain the problem, we talk through the whole thing. Fifteen minutes of question about the laptop, and he finally informs me that he can't help. He needs to transfer me to the department that handles battery and power issues. Isn't that exciting?
I get transferred. 30 minutes on hold. A technician answers. I explain my issue. He asks me a lot of questions. We waste ten minutes. Then he informs me that no, he's not in the laptop or battery or whatever department. He's in the software department. Well why the fuck didn't he say so in the first place when I started the call and said I had a problem with my battery?
I demand to talk to his supervisor, because I don't want to spend half an hour on hold listening to their crappy music. Thank God I have volume control on Skype. Supervisor comes on line, and I explain the situation, including the fact that I'm now two hours into this whole issue. She tells me that she'll have her technician get me to the right department, and I demand that he stay on the line with me while we're switching, because I'm really getting tired of wasting my entire Saturday afternoon on this issue.
We wait. We wait some more. The technician checks in every once in a while, and I check in every once in a while, just to make sure that he's still on the line. They play more crappy music. Finally someone comes online. The technician I had with me (which I had understood his name, but he's predictably in India) explained the issue to the technician who answered. That guy says, oh, sorry about that, but I can't helped. You've reached the Optiplex desktop department.
Oh, fuck.
Now we're transferring again (as I write this). It's a little after 5 PM, so I've been at it for four hours (read half a workday.
Fuck. Just got disconnected again. FUCK. FUCK.
I'm calling back, because I'm too fucking invested (and frustrated) with this process now. I'm ready to take a hammer to the damn laptop. I used to think Toshiba sucked, but no. Dell really really sucks.
What in God's name happened to their customer support? They used to great! Now ... it's crazy.
Update -- called back. Only 20 minutes on hold. Talked to a tech, and I may have expressed my frustration a little fervently, because he immediately transferred me to his manager. The manager is now explaining to me that even though my contract that I paid for clearly states nights and weekends, they are not going to honor that. Instead, they're going to ship me the parts and arrange an appointment for an onsite tech to install a new motherboard and AC adapter.
Now they are confirming the address information that they already shipped the wrong battery to. They are claiming that the technician will come on Monday, or possibly Tuesday. We shall see.
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If you're a drudge fan: drudgetracker.com
In any case, I love Apple's support, even as an individual. They are friendly and supportive, the hold time isn't too long, and they speak English, which is always nice.
My experience working in high-tech in Austin tells me few people go to work for Dell unless they absolutely have to (get laid off). Dell is not known for being an employee friendly company. Having worked for such a company (not Dell) in a "past life" I can tell you what happens. The competent people who are employable elsewhere leave, meaning the business is left with the flotsam, the people who can barely tie their own shoes. Quality suffers, the company slides, they cut back by outsourcing critical functions like customer support (after all, the hardware has been sold, why do they still need to support it?) and unless something happens the company slowly circles the bowl. We have two brands of computers at work: Dell and IBM/Lenovo. The IBM/Lenovo boxes blow the Dell's out of the water. The first Dell laptop I got at work, the USB ports were dead. My company's IT department refused to do anything about it because they didn't have time to deal with Dell. Seriously. Okay, I'm rambling now.
I am sorry that we have not lived up to your expectations and based on your account the kind of service and support we strive to deliver. We are working to get better and I appreciate hearing your complete situation. Think you can see my email and if you would contact me, Ill see what we can do to sort things out. Alternatively, please email your service tag and relevant case number to a special team I work with here. The email box is: Customer_Advocate@dell.com and mention RichardatDELL in the re: line
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